• Penni from Up Up n Away


Looking to get divorced during the delivery of your first child? Here’s how to make it happen.

STEP ONE: Park as far as you possibly can away from the hospital.

STEP TWO: Turn the room television on to any sport.

STEP THREE: Yawn. Even better, fall asleep beside her. That should end well.

STEP FOUR: Take selfies as your wife labours in the background.

STEP FIVE: Discuss how slow and long the process is.

STEP SIX: Comment on the fluids coming out of her. "Jeez hun, you’re really sweating a lot,

and leaking weird goo everywhere".

STEP SEVEN: Eat something super delicious. The more yummy the meal, the more likely a divorce.

STEP EIGHT: Complain about being sore. Those hospital chairs are pretty uncomfortable, hey?

STEP NINE: Wander down south without permission.

STEP TEN: Congratulate her with “See, that wasn’t so bad.” And follow it up with, “Hey, the baby

looks just like me!”

Source: wwwmumcentral.com.au

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