• Penni from Up Up n Away

LABOUR 101 FOR NEW DADS

Looking to get divorced during the delivery of your first child? Here’s how to make it happen.


STEP ONE: Park as far as you possibly can away from the hospital.


STEP TWO: Turn the room television on to any sport.


STEP THREE: Yawn. Even better, fall asleep beside her. That should end well.


STEP FOUR: Take selfies as your wife labours in the background.


STEP FIVE: Discuss how slow and long the process is.


STEP SIX: Comment on the fluids coming out of her. "Jeez hun, you’re really sweating a lot,

and leaking weird goo everywhere".


STEP SEVEN: Eat something super delicious. The more yummy the meal, the more likely a divorce.


STEP EIGHT: Complain about being sore. Those hospital chairs are pretty uncomfortable, hey?


STEP NINE: Wander down south without permission.


STEP TEN: Congratulate her with “See, that wasn’t so bad.” And follow it up with, “Hey, the baby

looks just like me!”





Source: wwwmumcentral.com.au

3 views0 comments